Forgiveness

G.K. Chesterton once said, "The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because generally they are the same people.” It’s no secret that those closest to us are often the hardest to forgive. I would even say that the one closest to us, namely ourselves, is the hardest to forgive. 

Forgiveness is probably the most difficult of all Christian ideals. For all therestrictions the Christian lifestyle implies, it is the notion of forgiving others and allowing ourselves to be forgiven that creates the most hesitation when considering Christianity. Make no mistake, the Christian ideal is tough. Chesterton also said, “The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting. It has been found difficult; and left untried.”

We are to forgive, though, and we are to be forgiven. “Forgiving and being forgiven are two names for the same thing. The important thing is that a discord has been resolved.” -C.S. Lewis

It’s part of God’s nature to forgive. Isaiah says that those who turn to God will be freely pardoned (55:6-7). The Psalmist said, “You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you” (86:5). I do not think, then, that it should come as a surprise that when the Lord Jesus Christ walked among men he told us, “...if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15).

So why must we allow ourselves to be forgiven? Why must we forgive ourselves? If we had the ability to love others without first loving ourselves, then what would be the point behind the second greatest commandment? “Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against anyone among your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.” -Leviticus 19:18

Love and forgivingness go hand in hand. Jesus also taught us, when a woman who lived in sin wept at his feet, "Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.” Then Jesus said to her, “Your sins are forgiven” (Luke 7:47-48).

There’s more to forgiving others, though. It is recognizing the reality of our circumstances. What happened when Christ died for us? Are we forgiven or not?

"The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." -Psalm 103:8-12

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God” -2 Corinthians 5:17-21

Likewise, Henry Ward Beecher said, “A forgiveness ought to be like a canceled note, torn in two and burned up, so that it can never be shown against the man.” God forgave us this way; so, that is how we are to forgive others.

There is more to forgiving others than to just ensure that we are forgiven ourselves. We forgive our brothers and sisters in Christ even before they repent so that they can be gently restored and so that we fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:1-2). We forgive and comfort those who have caused us grief so that they “will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow” (2 Corinthians 2:5-8). And we forgive in order to “get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice” just as Christ removed those from our hearts when he forgave us (Ephesians 4:31-32).

"You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Now we know that God’s judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. So when you, a mere human being, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?" -Romans 2:1-4

God’s kindness leads us to repentance. Maybe we were meant to be that kindness to lead others.

Discussion points:

Alexander Pope once said, “To err is human, to forgive, divine.” What do you think he meant by that?

Was a time in your life when forgiveness led you to repent? Is there ever a time we should not forgive?

Next week we’ll be talking about the difference between believing in someone and trusting in someone. Do you think that you need to believe in someone to forgive them? Do you need to trust someone to forgive them? Why or why not?

Jesus forgave us even before we knew we had sinned (Luke 23:34). If someone knows what they are doing is wrong and still does it, they are “unrepentant.” Can forgiveness be given if it is not asked for? Can forgiveness be given if it is not accepted? How can/should we emulate that?

Is there forgiveness without forgetting? What does forgetting mean to you? What scripture did you refer to for your answer?

God forgives and remembers no more (Hebrews 8:12, 10:17-18). God is all-knowing (Deuteronomy 29:29, Job 34:21, Hebrews 4:13, Colossians 2:3, 1 Corinthians 2:10). So, what does it mean that He forgets our sins?