Angry Persons

Frustration comes when we try to control our situation. Anger comes when we are overcome by our situation. Hurt comes when we make love conditional and expectations (trust) vital. A vengeful/begrudging spirit is the result of being overcome by hurt.

Every one of us has seen a child throw a tantrum in a store. We've all seen road rage. We've all seen the pictures and videos of rioting and looting. We don't need to teach anyone what anger is or what it looks like. What many of us don't know, however, is what to do with it and, often, where it comes from.

Anger usually comes from one of two places: frustration or hurt. Anger by itself is not a sin any more than alcohol is by itself sinful. However, being an angry person is just as destructive as being a drunkard.

Rather than do an eight-part series on anger, I'll give us biblical guidelines on anger and, hopefully, we can expound on these ideas in the comments throughout the week.

The Bible reveals several traits of an angry person and how to counteract them:

1. An angry person causes conflict; A peace-maker is patient. (Proverbs 15:18, 18:1, 29:22)

2. An angry person speaks without thinking; a righteous person weighs his answers. (Proverbs 15:28; James 1:19-20)

3. An angry person does not learn when rescued; let them pay the price or they will never understand. (Proverbs 19:19)

4. An angry person uses harsh language; a caring person is gentle in their response. (Proverbs 15:1)

5. An angry person infects the people around him; do not be friends with angry people. (Proverbs 22:24-25)

6. An angry person does not avoid fighting; a selfless person does not argue. (Proverbs 17:14, 18:1; Romans 12:18)

7. An angry person seeks revenge, repaying evil for evil; an overcomer blesses and does good to all people. (Romans 12:17-21; 1 Thessalonians 5:15; Proverbs 24:29)

8. An angry person holds grudges; those who trust God forgive. (Leviticus 19:18; 1 Peter 2:23; 3:9; Matthew 5:7,38-39; Mark 11:25)

Prideful, unforgiving, untrusting (of God), expectant (of people), and impatient hearts succumb to anger. Patient, considerate, gentle, and selfless hearts overcome anger with love and mercy. Love does not mean ignoring evil. Mercy does not mean giving in to evil. You are never responsible for the actions of other people. You are always responsible for your own actions.

For fear of putting my own ideas into your heads, I'll leave this here. There's a lot of room for expounding, but that's up to you.

Discussion points:

When, if ever, is anger justifiable?

Who makes you the most angry? Who angers you most often? Why?

The Bible says to drop a matter before it leads to a quarrel. What's the difference between backing down from a fight and dropping an issue that could lead to a fight? Is there a difference?

How do we dissolve friendships with angry people and still be friendly people?

What tips do you have for others to help them with their anger?